The continual appearance of newness, opportunity and change have asked me to question my habitual response patterns, specifically in how to ask myself questions in a different way. The record in my head, ran to the tune of, “What should I do?…. what should I not do?….when should I do it?….” That ‘should’ seemed to be an issue. The ‘should’ implied that I have a right choice and a wrong choice. It also implied that I will succeed or fail.
‘Should’ can take you out of yourself, and into a floating land of other people’s ‘shoulds’ and wants.
We make decisions best with a strong sense of our own values.
I now find myself asking questions to the tune of, “What ideally do I want?…what seems reasonable?….how can I prepare?… With those kinds of questions, I’ve stepped into a space of curiosity, and in that space, is when I can get creative and productive! Changing the words with which I speak to myself, very much effect the energy I bring in or not based on the energy of those words. The difference is the energy of scarcity, or abundance. Much so in this instance, was being in the space of self empowerment or not. ‘Should’ for me, was taking me out of my empowered self; really, it was making me forget that I am empowered. lol. That sounds funny as I type this. Forgetting we are empowered is like forgetting that the golden cape we are wearing gives us the ability to fly; I mean, who can forget that they can fly? Or for that matter, not see the obvious golden cape we are wearing as a reminder that we can.
When dealing with some challenges, I feel more positive, and centered within myself more often, although not without struggle, and deep breaths to help me process all of the resistance, letting go and moving forward that seem to happen on top of each other instead of sequentially at times. Gratefully, remembering that I am empowered and its effects on the way I feel, is trickling into other areas of my life. Yay.
In past I would try to see all the options at the same time and try to immediately find the ‘right’ decision so I would protect myself from feeling any kind of discomfort and pain. The question that begun the process of shifting my automatic reaction to a chosen response was,
“How is that working for you?”
I was tired of feeling a lingering stress response so often, that I decided I wanted to do something about it. Become curious about your stress. Sit in it. Feel it. (be mindful of a healthy amount of time to do so) Let it tell you what it’s trying to tell you; then use that information to find more efficient and easier ways to handle your situation. I believe we can make a situation hard, harder, or easier. Not necessarily always easy, but easier.
Hopefully you can begin to shine a little brighter, and shine a little easier. Then share your light.